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Archive for January, 2021

SkunkApe

May I simply direct you to the Skunk Ape Research Center? Enjoy.

Skunk Ape Research Center. Skunkape International LLC. Accessed March, 23 2020.

Read Florida Man: Battle of the Five Meth Labs: A Love Story here.

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Emu

After last Friday’s surprise New Year’s beheading, surely we can all use a friendly emu story (and not this).

Taco the amicable emu hopped his four-foot fence after being frightened by a dog—he was found wandering the streets a bit later. This wasn’t Taco’s first jailbreak—he escaped in 2012, apparently during mating season, in the hopes of locating some lucky lady emus.

Price, Wayne T. “Friendly Emu Named Taco Runs Wild in Cape Canaveral.” Florida Today. USA Today Network-Florida. October, 22, 1016.

Read Florida Man: Battle of the Five Meth Labs: A Love Story here.

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If I Had Some Crack

William John Lee and his accomplice Dana Ruth Valentine were arrested after they were seen breaking into three Delray Beach vehicles while driving a blue Nissan. They faced three counts of burglary, criminal mischief, and two counts of larceny. Lee was recorded by the in-car recording system of the patrol car as saying: “If I had some crack, I wouldn’t be out here stealing [stuff].” Bonus fact: Lee has a tattoo on his left foot, as described

By one correctional facility or another: “Lil Bad Boy Men,” and has a career stealing steals—among other things—that stretches back to 1990. This is Ms. Valentine only recorded offense.

Milian, Jorge. “Boynton Man: “If I Had Some Crack, I Wouldn’t Be Out Here Stealing…”The Palm Beach Post. Gannett Media Group. December 24, 2015.

And Happy New Year! Here’s your New Year Bonus Florida Man (holy shit, Florida Man, that’s a little much)!

Read Florida Man: Battle of the Five Meth Labs: A Love Story here.

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